Strange things are happening

Haven't written for a few days because things have been a little hectic. I mentioned that my family here were all aware that I am with Alex now. It seemed as if everyone approved or at least accepted that fact. However, it's true that things are not always as they seem. On Thanksgiving Alex went with me to a friend's place for about 2 hours and as soon as we arrived home the mother began yelling at us both. I don't even know what she said because I was on the phone with my family in the US and just walked away. Apparently she was mad that we had been out together or out at all; I'm not sure.
The following day she barely looked at or spoke to me. That evening I came home to discover that the 12 year old monster in my house had gone through my cell phone and read all my text messages from Alex. He thought this was very amusing until Alex told him that he was going to spank him if he behaved that way again. As a result of all these things going on in the house I began talking to Alex about moving out. With not much time left here I thought I'd give it a few more days of consideration.
Saturday Alex and I left in the morning to go to Thies. This is a cute little town that actual reminded me a little of Ohio towns. It's about 2 hours away by car. It'd probably be a lot shorter drive if there were more than one road out of Dakar but oh well. To go to basically anywhere outside Dakar you must take a taxi to what is called the garage. However, this is not at all a garage as in our sense of the term. The first time we went there I kept wondering... but wait, where is the garage? Basically it's a giant field or dead and dying station wagons with signs for pretty much any destination in Senegal. You have to find your sign and then bargain with the drivers to go there. At the same time you're being swarmed by people selling absolutely everything you can imagine from Q-tips to bananas. Once we'd found a car we climbed into the back where Alex's knees were about in his chin and his head was hitting the ceiling on every bump like it was Honey, I Shrunk the Car or something. The rest of the car is filled with strangers who are usually very friendly. We sat a good twenty minutes because the driver couldn't make change for us. We had given him a 5 mille (equivalent to $10) and the trip was 3 mille. This is a constant problem in Senegal. Due to the fact that I have a bank card only and the machines give only 5 and 10 mille bills I often get incredibly dirty looks. On the way there I saw a goat get obliterated by a truck which was rather sad.
Anyway, we spent the morning meandering the cute little town of Thies. The most exciting thing to happen was when a large mob of children literally chased me down the street to shake my hand and say hello. If you're white you're a total celeb here. After the morning we headed to Alex's cousin's house. This was not a planned part of our excursion but we bumped into her while we were at the 'garage' and took her number.
We had lunch with her and then Alex went to buy some beer. I have only consumed alcohol a handful of times since I've been in this country but I find that each time I do I feel ill afterwards. I told him the last time I didn't want to drink anymore but of course it was in front of me so I drank about a beer and a half. Afterward we took a nap and I started to feel sick. We decided to start walking for a car to go back to Dakar.
As he bargained for the car I started to feel a cold sweat coming on and thought maybe my legs would give out from under me. Most of the venders were leaving me alone and staring at me as if they thought, "whoa, what's with the tubaab?"
Once we got into the car we had to sit to wait for the other seats to fill up. Luckily when I bought a bottle of water that morning the man at the boutique had given me two plastic bags, neither of which had any use for... that is until now. So, at this point I knew there was no turning back and that I was going to vomit in a plastic bag in front of a bunch of staring Senegalese. After that was over I tied the bag up and Alex paid some kid a quarter to take the bag to a trash can. Since the kid was obviously very poor and handed a mysterious bag by a white person I made Alex make it very clear that he should not open the bag. After we had started off I used the other bag to throw up in two more times and resolved to definitely not drink again for the rest of my time in Senegal.
After all that I wanted nothing more than to come home, take a shower, and go to sleep. Yet, as soon as I got out of the shower I was told to go talk to my mother. I decided that whatever this conversation was involving would be the decision maker on whether I would finish the program at this house or not.
The conversation began with me being disciplined for asking informing Alex of his nasty little brother's antics instead of them, which I chose to do knowing they would do nothing to him. I was right about that because she defended her son's actions by saying he was young though I countered with, but not too young to know that wasn't an appropriate thing to do. Then I was also scolded for being on the terrace with Alex the night before. Something which I was never technically told I wasn't allowed to do. In the past she has told me to go upstairs and take tea with my brothers or eat with them. I explained this to her and she said that now all that has changed. So, I began to leave the room when she yelled out, "You and Alex cannot leave each other's side!" So I asked why that was a problem for her. She came storming out of the living room faster than I've ever seen her do anything because in the past all she's ever done is lay around shouting out orders to her daughter/slave. She went on to say that I was going to leave Alex and I said, "yes, I have to go back to my own family. he knows that. that's between us; it's not your affair. he's not a child". She then said, "this isn't the US, that's not how it works in Senegal. And Alex is going to leave you because you're not nice!" At which point I said, "D'accord, je vais quitter la maison" (okay, I'm going to leave the house.) and she yelled "Quitte!" (LEAVE!) Therefore, Saturday night, to continue the not so fine day I'd had, I packed my things and walked down the street to Alex's friends' room. The next day when I came to take my things his mom yelled at him to come in the house as he helped me to carry my suitcases down. Afterward she sent her sick daughter/slave running after me down the street to ask me for the money for the soiree she had invited us to. I laughed and said, "Margo, I'm not going to the soiree."
So, it's very tough having a cross-cultural relationship. The longer I'm in it the more difficult it seems to become. I have always been such a free-spirit and now I have a 28 year old boyfriend who I am crazy over but who lives with his mom and can't stay the night with me and doesn't like to kiss in public. None of that is because he's weird or a loser or anything except that he's Senegalese. The more I find myself getting frustrated with all these cultural differences the less open-minded I feel. Maybe I'm just tired. When you live with Senegalese people, work with Senegalese people, go out with Senegalese people, when you stop thinking in your own language and the only place you can go to be American is the computer lab at your school it gets really draining. Some parts of me are ready to come home, despite that I'm going to sorely miss this place and I'm going to be sadder than maybe ever in my life that my first real love is across the Atlantic. But, I miss Christmas music, and a warm house in cold weather, and couches, coffee shops with slow quiet music and the murmor of voices, taking classes, and all my friends and family. Sometimes I wish it were just easy to go back and forth, like when I go from Athens to Cincy. Just a hop skip and a jump and I'm home again. If that were possible I could have a little taste of home every now and then and it would suffice. As it is I'm just about ready to go back to my own world and maybe if the fates allow I will make it back here again because it's definitely got a big piece of my heart.